Deep Breaths

Yesterday was a day where I had to take lots of them.

I think I can count on one hand (okay, maybe two) the days in which I have really and truly wanted to escape my house, escape being a mom, and gasp...escape Logan.  And this my friends was one of them.

We have been potty training since Friday morning and have only left the house three times.  For one who gets a bit stir crazy, I think it's safe to say that Logan is having a tough time with it.  And, oh yea, so am I.  

Day one was tough but to be expected for the first day.  Day two we made some break throughs and I still had my patience and poise.  Day three was more of the same.  Day four I was starting to crack and wondering where exactly the '3-day method' went wrong.  And dreaded day five was just plain horrible.  Regress plus some.  Not only did she not make the potty once, I could swear that Lo was looking right at me while peeing on the floor with a glimmer of "Ha ha, what are you going to do mom?" in her eyes.  

So what exactly did I do?  Well naturally, after what seemed like the 20th accident in a twenty minute period, I got mad.  Really mad.  Which made her cry and fear the potty in that second.  Which made me cry.  Which made her cry some more.  Authors and experts on the subject are shaking their shameful finger at me and the potty training Gods are laughing at my rookie mistakes.  The entire day was filled with tears and deep breaths and periods of me hiding in the closet (you think I'm kidding).  She has become clingy, whiny, possessive and simply exhausted in these past several days.  Make that two of us.  Lets just say that I have contemplated more than once just how bad it would be to pour a glass of wine at 10:00am.

We will forge on today if for no other reason than that I am stubborn.  I am committed and think? know that she can do it.  Gone are the days of diapers and I didn't stay at home for six beautiful days in a row for nothing.  Yep, I will continue the cookie hand outs, the sticker progress chart, the praise and the pleading...even though I am quite sure that our house smells like a hint of urine.

So unless you are going to tell me that it gets better (immediately) or are willing to offer a few magic tricks, please don't tell me that she's too young, or that I am doing it wrong or that your little one potty trained in a day.  I just may lose it.

And if you want an idea of how I feel, take a look at how L looks.  We're pretty much one in the same at this point.  It's war around here.

By the way - my sister in law jokingly told me about a service that will potty train your child while you and your spouse go away for the weekend.  Come back in two days and - poof! - the process is done. Although I am not sure the method or the pretty penny for such a service, I am not too proud to say that this would be the way to go yall.

Seriously.